life has been boring and uneventful this past week. i am pretty sure my "odd" mood hasn't helped either. i mean robyn's family is here and we have been hanging out with them a bit, we did make it to the aquarium and zoo with them but it seems its all been a little lacklustre. i get into these funks emotionally every few months and they kind of stink. they never last long but they stink none the less. to make matters worse our water heater broke on sunday....yuck. time is moving forward (we are nearly 3 weeks into june) and i seem to be at a standstill.
i'm struggling with my efforts in son-rearing and i hate it. i thought my love for jude would be enough but apparently there is more to it. he has been difficult (to say it REALLY nicely) for me lately. most people tell me its normal and others either look at me and sigh to themselves "my kids are so perfect..... sure glad they are not like that jude" or think "poor jude's mother does not know how to discipline him effectively". i can't say i blame them because his rage moments are ones to be reckoned with. am i the only parents that really prays that their child will grow up to be a nice person? i am just thankful that his sweet moments are more often than his sour ones. the worst part is i know i am to blame for 88% of his frustrations. i really hope i can make it without tears from both of us today.
greta is doing wonderful, so wonderful that i sometimes forget that i ever worried about her. i forget about her struggles and disabilities that (i) labeled her with. she of course still has some issues but to me its normal, normal greta. she is just my greta and making such progress. its a fine line between worrying about her and feeling that everything is okay with her. i hope and pray that our faith in her will make her whole. gretsie is a delight. she is milli-seconds from crawling and is even starting to shift weight on her legs in the standing position. the positions she gets into are painful to watch but are hilarious all the same. i am currently in the process of documenting greta's positions and movements so stay tuned.
so thats all..... life keeps going and going and going and going and i hope i can catch up with it this week.
here are some pictures of grets playing in her room from this morning
greta's favorite game to play is hide and seek in her armore. she points to it every time we are in her room and a good time is had by all.
7 comments:
ew gross.
greta is not very cute at all.
:)
hang in there...
soon enough the monsoon will pass and we will be bathing in the waters of cowabunga bay.
i love you sister
This too shall pass. You need some serious sunshine! We all have our moments of questioning our parenting skills. Nobody tells you how challenging it can be at times. But the good outweighs the bad, as you say. And could Grets be any cuter...the little Cupie Doll! Hang in there, K-dig! XOXO
Kennan,
This goes straight to my heart! My "jude" named Thomas is an amazing man! I cannot even begin to tell you of the challenges we had with him! I really, really wondered, until he was about 17 if you want my honesty :)
He's nearly 21, on a mission, doing well in all he does. He really did grow up!
I will admit I was a significant contributor to our difficulties...in part because he's JUST LIKE ME! and only one of us can be right. Lots of prayer, and more prayer, hours and hours of counseling for all...
They weren't all hard days but there were TOOOO many of them.
Hang in there.
My key words from my favorite counselor: Preserve the relationship and remove your anger.
That's why they come so cute.
That's why we're so invested.
I'm a much better mom at 44 than I was at your age :( the best part is, he has no negative childhood memories, really.
I love you. Always will. Kiss both of your cuties for me.
I kind of feel like that comment "my kids are so perfect..... sure glad they are not like that jude" is meant towards me and my children. Maybe just Abe..... No ones kids are perfect, and any honest parent will tell you as much. Having kids is HARD! They all have hard stages, some more than others. It's about not giving up and trying new things. You are great! Your kids are great. Greta is soo YUMMY! Jude is FUNNY! We love you and your family!!! Could you get us some sunshine before I go home! I love you.
~Robyn
You need to come over to my house again, only this time, stay long enough to want ear plugs and a sedative. I figure it would take about half an hour of all my kids being awake.
When I'm in a good enough mood to be optomistic, I try to think that my kids are here to make me a better person. Sometimes the only way to do that is to push me to my breaking point, which they do on a regular basis, and when I recover from it and rebuild, I hope that I'm stronger for next time. There are so many days that I shut down, go to bed in tears and hope to wake up the next morning with slightly more endurance to deal with life. Sometimes I do, sometimes I don't.
So basically, in a million words, I feel your pain. I really do.
Okay my comment really doesn't have anything to do with this post, but I SO wish I lived in UT so I could come Rollerblading with you & Brooke. Don't worry I already have a pair & they have their own Rollerblading bag & my husband has tried on several occasions to get rid of them! THE NERVE!
And in case you were wondering...I think you're a great mom. We all have moments we'd like to beat our kids...um, like today as I hauled a screaming 2 year old out of Old Navy in the football hold while a screaming newborn accompanied us in the stroller.
It's hard.
And it's okay to have bad days, weeks and months.
what a sweet little outfit. Let's go shopping! That always gets me out of a funk. I tried to comment on your rollerblading post. I can't remember what I said, but I'm sure it had to do with your scrunch socks sticking up out of your blaes. And probably that I want to join the rollerblade brigade. Went to the Rack yesterday, missed your face.
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